Reducing Conflict 25 Stop Acting Like Children

January 24, 2022

If you observe people in conflict at work, you can see their actions often resemble the actions of young children.  They are not consciously trying to be immature, but they exhibit the mannerisms that typically define kids in the schoolyard.

You can observe bullying, sulking, bribery, physical violence, tantrums, intimidation, along with a host of other juvenile behaviors.

It can be individual mannerisms or group-to-group activity.  It is so common that we almost expect to see it every day at work. The consequences of these activities are at least a distraction from the vital work we are supposed to be doing and at worst destroying the culture of the group. Is there no way out?  The hopeful answer is, there is a way out.

One Way to Stop It

I recall one group where I was a leader. There had been some child-like behaviors in the past.  When I asked the group how we wanted to tackle the problem, they said, “Let’s just make a rule that we will act like adults at all times. If someone is acting like a child, we will remind him or her of the rule that helps define our culture.”  

Having an agreed-upon intention was important in that case because it made the expected behavior highly visible. If someone was having a tantrum, we would just give a little hand signal that had the thumb and first finger very close together. It was a sign to make childish behavior very small.

Another group I heard about would use a verbal cue to remind people of the rule. When someone was acting like a child, they would say, “can I get you a cup of coffee?” Usually, that reminder was enough to stop the behavior. If it persisted, then the observing person would be encouraged to bring it to the attention of the manager.

What About Virtual Fights

Sometimes the fight takes place in the virtual world. One person will put out some “bait” in a nasty email and the other person will snap at it. Before long, the two people are fighting openly and the distribution gets embarrassingly large. 

The way to prevent email battles is to just not take the bait.  Simply do not respond to someone who is trying to bully you into a fight. Eventually, that person will realize that the tactic does not work on you.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on how to stop individuals and groups from acting like children.

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 


Reducing Conflict 24 Don’t Talk Behind People’s Backs

January 17, 2022

A common way of creating conflict in an organization is to gossip about other people behind their backs.  No matter how you try to keep the bad-mouthing discreet, the information is eventually going to leak around the edges, and you will suffer a loss of trust.  

It is easy to observe small cliques generating rumors about other groups in order to gain positional power over them.  The dynamic is in play nearly every day in many organizations, and the price of such foolishness is huge. What if we could create an environment of high trust such that people would not play games with each other?

The cure

To prevent the inevitable conflict, make it your business to have high integrity and not work to undermine others behind their backs. I think it is helpful if a group gets together and established a group expectation that we will not spread rumors about each other.

That rule gives people permission to exit any conversation that seems to be heading in the direction of low integrity. People can simply stop the action by saying, “I am not interested in discussions that include speculation about other people.”

Why People Gossip

I believe that some people are inclined to gossip more than others. Sometimes it may be out of personal insecurity themselves. In addition, some people try to gain status or power by being a person “in the know.” The interesting phenomenon is that the person may be doing it to gain power when the end result is the exact opposite.

When people in the group recognize you as someone who spreads gossip about others, your power goes DOWN dramatically.  The reason is that people will be wary about what you might be telling others about them. If your intention was to amplify your own power, you are actually achieving the opposite.

Make Integrity a Value

By having a group value of high integrity, you can obtain consensus that we only speak in support of each other.  If something seems like it is not right, we will take it up with the other person directly. That is modeling a value of integrity that cuts through all the game-playing so people can begin to trust one another.

Leaders need to show the way by not allowing marginal discussions in their own sphere and insisting that others in the organization model the same behavior.  By doing so, you cut off the problem before it starts to undermine the morale of the group.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on how to create a culture where people don’t talk behind other people’s backs.

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 


Reducing Conflict 23 Extend More Trust

January 10, 2022

If you are a leader and you want to see more trust within your group, your first order of business is to find ways to extend more trust. 

Many leaders fail to recognize this basic law of trust, and they picture their employees as being not trustworthy.  The reality is that the vast majority of people will act in a trustworthy manner if they are well led.

Leaders who fail to extend trust because their people are “not trustworthy” need to take a long hard look in the mirror to view the source of their problem.

I have witnessed numerous managers who beat on their people and have little faith in their capabilities. The employees habitually respond by lowering their performance to match their leader’s expectations.

Trust is reciprocal, so if you want to experience more trust within your group, you need to find ways to show more trust in them. 

Some Examples

If you cannot yet trust a professional colleague to handle a large and critical negotiation with another organization, perhaps you can trust her to assemble and present the relevant documentation for more experienced lawyers to use in the negotiation.

If you cannot trust your teenage son to drive the car to a late-night party, perhaps you can trust him to check in with you if he needs help and to complete his homework before he leaves.

If you cannot yet trust a newly-hired mechanic to rebuild a complex transmission, perhaps you can trust him to assist in the disassembly and cleaning of the parts.

Show the tendency to trust more

By showing an inclination to trust other people to the edge of their capability you will encourage them to trust you back and be motivated to gain more skills for the future. They will almost always rise to meet your expectations.

Do not extend blind trust way beyond the current capability of the individual. That approach would be setting him up for failure. If there is a failure along the way, don’t persecute the individual, instead consider it a learning opportunity for the person.

We all learned to walk and talk by trial and error. We fell on our backside enough times to figure out how to balance our huge mass on two tiny feet.  When you think about the skill of walking upright, it really is a miracle we can do it, yet we just take it for granted in most cases.

Give people the blessing of learning by trial and error.  In the case of walking, coach them gently on how to obtain better balance.  Don’t yell at them for falling down. Praise them for getting back up and trying again. 

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on how to extend more trust.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cIw_lY58QM

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 


Reducing Conflict 22 Care for Other People

January 3, 2022

The most potent way to reduce conflict within any group is to get the people to genuinely care for each other. It is so obvious, we sometimes forget.

There are always going to be stress points between people. That is a fact of life, but when people have the ability to rise above the petty annoyances and truly care for other people, the conflict has a short lifespan.

It’s pretty hard to stay mad at a person who just brought you a chocolate chip cookie as a surprise. Sometimes a soothing and gentle word is enough to change the vector of some inter-group squabbles.

Important concepts

I learned a lesson early in my career that stuck with me.  When you extend kindness when it is not expected, it has double the power. When you surprise someone with a gracious gesture, it really goes a long way.

Remember your body language

Another thing to remember is that it does not take tangible gifts to turn a sour situation sweet.  What you say is critical, and how you say it is even more important. 

Keep in mind that we extract more meaning from body language and tone of voice than the actual words that are being used.

If you are feeling anger toward another person, it will show all over your body.  When there is conflict, get into a happier state of mind before trying to patch things up.

Notes can help

Often a note that has the right flavor will reduce conflict between people. Imagine you and Mike had an argument on how to accomplish a tricky step on a project. You decided to go with Mike’s approach. 

Now imagine you wrote a note to Mike’s manager telling her how Mike’s contribution was pivotal in allowing a successful conclusion to the project.  You copy Mike on the note.  He is going to appreciate the gesture and may even send a note of thanks back to you.

Remember to praise in writing when possible. If there is some constructive criticism, keep that verbal because verbal input has a half-life. Notes remain forever.

Find Special Ways to Demonstrate That You Care

There are an infinite number of ways you can show another person you care about her.  One word of caution: make sure your gestures are genuine and not an act. When you put on a phony show of affection it can do more damage than you might think.

The other person will write you off as a jerk and your attempt to calm the situation will have backfired.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on how to care for other people.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xW0SQ8xE598

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 

 


Reducing Conflict 21 Take a Mental Vacation

December 27, 2021

In this brief article, I will share a technique that will allow you to take a vacation in your mind anytime you wish.

Imagine you are in a conflict situation at work and you are getting pretty worked up. Imagine the blessing of being able to transport yourself into an activity that you find personally peaceful and rejuvenating.

Create Your Ideal Environment in Your Mind

The technique to accomplish this transformative activity is rather simple to do, but it does take practice. First, you need to create some separation from your current stressors.

Sit in a comfortable place with your feet on the floor and breathe deeply for about 30 seconds with your eyes closed.  Now begin to imagine that you are in your most happy place in the world.

Get All of Your Senses Involved in the Analogy

The trick here is to get as many of your senses involved in making the journey to your imaginary haven as possible.  Let me share an example to illustrate. Suppose your ideal vacation spot would be on a warm beach in Mexico.

Keep your eyes closed and begin to hear the lapping of the waves as they roll in from the warm sea.  Smell and taste the salty air around you. Feel the breeze as it touches lightly on your skin. Enjoy the warm feeling of the sun on your skin. Taste the sweet and salty margarita that the waiter just gave you.

Keep breathing deeply as you experience the peacefulness of the beach and the warm sand beneath you.  Within a minute or two, your blood pressure will go down and you will experience a kind of restorative force that feels terrific.

Slowly Come Back to Reality

Now, it is time to come back down to earth and join civilization again, but you will be in a completely different mindset than you were in just a few minutes earlier.

As you engage with other people (who prior to the exercise were annoying you), continue to feel the warm beach and engage them with kindness and empathy. You will appear to be a different person to the former agitator, and the interaction is likely to take a much more constructive turn. 

The actual environment has not changed, but you are a changed person, having just returned from your vacation.  You will be amazed at how well this technique works to reduce conflict in your world.  The world is actually the same, but you are very different.  That makes all the difference.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on the technique to take a mental vacation.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ikYxbqQmNSs

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 


Reducing Conflict 20 Live and Let Live

December 20, 2021

We all need to learn to live and let live. One of the more frequent sources of conflict at home or at work is the tendency for one person to try to  “fix” another person. We look at the habits of other people, and because they are not our own, they can tend to grate on us over time.

One of my favorite comedians is Mark Gungor. He has a great routine on this topic. He says that the fundamental argument in most marriages is “Why can’t you be more like me?  I’m fabulous, and you are clearly mentally deranged.”

Very Common Problem.

At the office, where people are often operating many hours per week in close proximity, the petty annoyances build up to a flashpoint regularly, and we attempt to “fix” the other person because the clipping of his nails every few days drives us crazy.

We need to realize that the petty problems are just that, and truth be told, we probably annoy the other person as much as he does us. Is there no hope for a peaceful coexistence? Thankfully, the answer is “yes.”

How to Liberate Yourself

The first thing to realize is that when you dwell on the habits of other people, what you are really doing is making yourself miserable. You do have a choice to rise above the petty problems and create more joy for yourself. By doing so you enhance the relationship for both people and have less conflict in your life.

For some reason, our Creator programmed in a tendency to want to influence other people to have similar habits to our own. It probably originates as an ego response. Get over it and you will be much happier and also much more popular.

Just because another human being’s issues are driving us crazy does not mean we need to dwell on these negative thoughts and suffer. We are really cheating ourselves out of a happier existence.

Get into the habit of looking past the issues that bug you every day.  Stop trying to “fix” the other people in your life and you will live a happier life.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on the technique to live and let live.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDgKFItJIlk

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 


Reducing Conflict 19 Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

December 13, 2021

When you stop and look at it, most conflict between people in organizations is about things of little consequence. It is the tiny petty annoyances that grind exceedingly small and get on our nerves. Over time, we tend to build up the minor annoyances into mega problems between people.

The phenomenon is not confined to the workplace either. It often happens in the home and has been known to break up marriages.   

An acquaintance of mine named Randy Pennington from the National Speaker’s Association does a fun little video that illustrates the point rather well. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oqLUAm9IBFs.

After he got married, he discovered that his wife squeezed the toothpaste from the middle of the tube while Randy was a bottom squeezer. He goes through a whole story of how that minor irritation built up in him until he finally exploded.  His wife, who had been doing it on purpose, told him, “It’s a 79 cent problem.” 

At work, it is often the close proximity of individuals working together in a cubicle day after day that brings out these petty annoyances until one party cannot take it anymore and open conflict begins. The best defense is to remind yourself that the issue you are getting worked up over is really inconsequential in the long run. 

If you see two people in conflict over something trivial, you can get them to describe the true impact of the sin being committed.  Often that discussion is enough to get the two people to bury the hatchet.

You can witness two people in conflict where one person has habit 1 that annoys the other person, so he invents habit 2 to get even with his office mate. Back and forth they go escalating the small hurts until the issues become a breaking point. 

The best defense when this situation occurs is to try for a rational discussion about the issues and see if the two people can agree to back off. Often when both people realize how they have blown the issues way out of proportion, they can snicker and brush off the problem.

I have seen this situation get so bad that management had to intervene and actually move one person to a different cubicle. That is only a temporary solution because human beings in close proximity do tend to get on each other’s nerves eventually.  

Conclusion

Recognize that bickering over trivial issues is part of the human condition. Be alert for the signs of a minor problem building into a major issue and intervene early to keep things from blowing up.

 

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on the technique of not sweating the small stuff along with more antidotes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qh1993Zv6-M

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 

 


Reducing Conflict 18 Reversing Roles

December 6, 2021

When two people are in conflict, sometimes it is helpful to reverse roles. The technique usually helps because it shifts the perspective of both people as they try to articulate the points made by their opponent. 

There is one very large caveat with this method that I will reveal later in this article.

I believe the method is helpful primarily because it forces both people to listen carefully to the points made by the other person. If you are my opponent in the disagreement, the only way I can assume your side is to fully understand what it is. 

That means I need to listen enough to your point of view to describe it once the roles are reversed.  The same phenomenon occurs with you trying to argue for my points.

Often times just getting ready to reverse the roles forces a level of understanding that was absent when we were just shouting at each other. That may lead to a creative solution that is a third point of view, or I may come to realize your logic was better than mine.  Either way, we can put the disagreement behind us and move on.

The caveat is that both sides need to play the game fairly, or it will not work. I learned that lesson early in my career when I had a disagreement with an engineer named  Frank over how to accomplish the installation of a new packaging line. 

Frank wanted to keep an adjacent line running while we installed the new one.  I favored building up enough inventory so we could shut down the adjacent line in order to have a safer installation process.

We were at loggerheads one afternoon in his office. Both of us were so convinced that our way was better that we made little progress toward a resolution for over an hour.  Finally, I said, “We are not getting anywhere here, why don’t we reverse roles to see if that shifts our thinking?”

Frank said, “That seems a little childish, but I will play along with you. You go first.”I shifted my mental process over to advocate for his side.  I went down the six reasons he had given for why his approach was best.  Frank listened and nodded as if to say, “Right, that was the point I was making.”

I then said, “OK I spelled out your side, now it is time for you to advocate for my way.”  Frank leveled me with the following statement, “Well, Bob, I was going to advocate for the opposite approach, but listening carefully to the points you just gave, I have to agree that what you described makes the most sense.” I lost the argument

Actually, by stepping back and playing the reverse role game, we were both able to see a third pathway that had elements of the advantages of both approaches.  Essentially, we came up with a third possibility that was better than either of the two opposing views.

You can use the reverse role technique if you are the mediator between two people who are at odds; just make sure that both people play fairly.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on the technique of reversing roles.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQjWLy_0l48

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.

 


Reducing Conflict 17 Get a Word In Edgewise

November 29, 2021

Do you have trouble getting a word in edgewise when dealing with a compulsive talker? Some people have a habit of constantly talking.  It may not seem like a big deal, but if you have a compulsive talker in your group, he or she can cause all kinds of problems. 

The first problem is that they tie up people from doing their work.  It really saps productivity when you are constantly distracted by someone rambling on.  It can also affect group productivity in certain circumstances.

The second problem is that often the tone of the excessive talker can be negative. This not only ties people up, it lowers morale because of all the negative points.  Often the person will pit one group of people against another, sowing division. This problem leads to silo thinking, which is another form of productivity loss. 

What Can be Done

Trying to retrain a compulsive talker is usually a vexing task.  The talker does not even realize there is a problem.  If you try to explain the negative influence, you will usually encounter denial.  If you suggest the talker just keep quiet for at least 70% of the time, there may be an agreement to try, but the habit will likely not change very much.

One technique is to appeal to the person’s more noble instincts and suggest that if others took up that much air time nothing would get done. Other people have a right to be heard as well.   

Isolating the talker in a remote area is one possible solution, but it really is ineffective because the person always finds a way to communicate anyway.

The best defense is to screen out people who have this problem during the interview process. They are really quite easy to spot, so you can save yourself a lot of grief by not having the person on the team at all.

If you have a rather mature team and members are complaining about the talker, you might try a candid discussion during a group meeting. Invent some kind of signal that people can use when the talker is rambling on. That can work, or it can backfire depending on the particular culture within the group.

Examples

I once had a customer service person who had this problem. I tried to get her to see that she was not doing her fair share of the work because she was always chatting with her mates. I finally isolated her and gave her more work to do in order to keep her relatively quiet. These ideas were only partially successful, and she did not appreciate the increased workload.

I know a man in our local grocery store who has the problem.  He is constantly chatting with the various customers as a way to express friendliness. For me, he is a huge distraction, and I try to avoid him at all costs. I’m not sure if some people enjoy his constant blithering, but I sure don’t.

Some Training Programs

There are some training programs to help people speak more succinctly.  These might be effective in some percentage of cases, but most compulsive talkers would not really want to change, so the training would not be very effective.

Conclusion

Having a constant talker on your team can be a challenging problem to solve. Some of the techniques suggested may be helpful, but none of them would work equally well for all people. You need to try different approaches and stick with the one that works best for that person.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on how to deal with a Compulsive Talker.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X–gb3lDAa0

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.


Reducing Conflict 16 The Passive Aggressive

November 22, 2021

The passive aggressive is an interesting and frustrating type of personality. The person may seem moody or detached from reality. He or she may avoid other people at times. Sulking, backhanded compliments, procrastination, withdrawal, and refusal to communicate are all signs of passive aggression.

When passive aggressive people are called out for being negative or angry, they often will express denial. What they are really doing is trying to shut down communication so they do not have to face the issue.

What Causes People to be Passive Aggressive at Work

There are several things that can give rise to Passive Aggressive behavior.  If the person feels under-appreciated or oppressed at work, it can cause the symptoms. Workload is also an issue. If leaders create unreasonable expectations for what can be accomplished or fail to give the proper support, then people are going to push back in various ways.

Sometimes the problem stems back to some parental or scholastic abuse where the child did not feel welcome expressing ideas or concerns.

The person may be naturally lazy and inclined to procrastinate whenever given a difficult task. It may be a way to punish the person asking for the work or just a ploy to put off unrewarding tasks as long as possible.

The person may feel he or she is being unfairly singled out to do more than his or her fair share of the work.

How to Help a Passive Aggressive Person at Work

There are a number of ways to cope with a passive aggressive person, and some will work for one individual and not another.  You have to experiment with different techniques. 

Sometimes just paying a little more attention to the person or giving some positive feedback will cause movement in the right direction.  Also, peer pressure or coaching can be useful ways to shift the thinking pattern. Sometimes it just takes working with a partner.

I think the best way to cope with a passive aggressive person is to find the triggers that light up the person’s enthusiasm.  Get to know the person better.  Find out when he or she is really excited to tackle a difficult task.  I believe there are situations where we all will light up and dive into the work with pleasure.  Find out the key to this person’s motivation and see if you can supply more of that ingredient.

Some people will light up when given a significant challenge.  Others may be motivated by some form of reward.  Still, others may just be seeking recognition for their good work.  If you can find the motivational key and provide more of that factor, you can often change the annoying behaviors.

It is one of the most satisfying aspects of leadership to take a person who has passive aggressive behavior patterns and help the person out of the funk. It is possible if you stick with it and refrain from badgering the individual.

Free Video

Here is a 3-minute video that contains more information on how to deal with a Passive Aggressive.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FPOFxVaxTc  

Bob Whipple, MBA, CPTD, is a consultant, trainer, speaker, and author in the areas of leadership and trust.  He is the author of four books: 1.The Trust Factor: Advanced Leadership for Professionals (2003), 2. Understanding E-Body Language: Building Trust Online (2006), 3. Leading with Trust is Like Sailing Downwind (2009), and 4. Trust in Transition: Navigating Organizational Change (2014). In addition, he has authored over 1000 articles and videos on various topics in leadership and trust. Bob has many years as a senior executive with a Fortune 500 Company and with non-profit organizations.